Get back
by Good old fashioned lover girl
Summary: 1975. John Lennon is married to Yoko Ono, but is she really the love of his life? He would have to choose between staying with his wife or starting a life with his former band mate, Paul McCartney. He decides to fix his relationship with his son Julian, along with other important decisions... McLennon.
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N This is basically McLennon post-Beatles, set in about 1975 when John was married to Yoko. Let's just imagine that Paul married Linda and then divorced her, and John didn't have Sean. The part that's all in italic letters, it's Paul's flashback.**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own anyone in this story and this obviously never happened**_

* * *

It was a rainy day of 1975 where John Lennon was at his old friend Paul McCartney's flat in New York City. Paul actually lived in London, but he had bought a little flat in that city for the cases in which he needed to be in The United States. A lot of things had happened since The Beatles' separated. In 1969, John was completely sure Yoko Ono was the love of his life, the woman he wanted to spend with the rest of his years, his biggest inspiration and reason of breathing. Now he wasn't so sure anymore. If he really loved his wife that much, then why he had been seeing Paul secretly, and cheating on her with his best friend? He knows he cheated Cynthia a lot of times, but he never truly loved her at the point that he didn't care all the time he cheated. Of course, he always felt a little guilty afterwards, because Cyn didn't deserve that.

With Yoko everything was different; it seemed that nothing or no one else cared to Lennon, only the Asian older bird that won the musician's heart. Because of her, he broke promises he had with the band, like the fact that she attended every single recording session, and the rest of the Beatles hated that. They were annoyed by the fact that any other girl or person that wasn't Brian Epstein, George Martin, or someone helping with the recording or production had never been allowed to be there with them; it was a strict rule that John Lennon broke. Sometimes, when the Beatles needed to be together for something, John called from New York City saying that he couldn't go; the reason was always her. John Winston Lennon was tired of The Beatles. He wanted a solo career with Ono. She didn't really know much about music, and her singing voice wasn't talented at all. But the love the ex-Beatle had for her made him blind. Had he changed his mind? Did his feelings about her ended?

Right now, he was kissing Paul eagerly in the living room's sofa, and the last thing he could have in his thoughts was her. He was enjoying the taste of his best friend's lips, when suddenly, the younger man separated and stopped John's kiss. "I can't do this anymore, John."

"What?"

"Can't you see? You're cheating your wife with me just like you cheated Cynthia with her. It's not fair. I don't like her at all, but I can't keep doing this."

"Calm down, Paulie." John attempted to keep kissing him, but Paul pushed him away very upsetly.

"Do you think this is a game?"

John confusedly asked, "What do you mean?"

"Seems like you don't give a damn about anything; you never did. You quit the band almost saying you hated me and didn't want to see me again, abandoned everything to be with her and now you don't care!"

"What if I changed my mind about her?"

"Just like you changed your mind about The Beatles? First you were the most enthusiastic, the one who started all, and then you hated being a Beatle. When you love something for a while, you always end up not caring and then hating it."

"I'm just…"

"You're just what? You always act without thinking. You're 35 years old. We're not those teenagers from Liverpool anymore."

"I'm just stupid, all right?"

"We shouldn't see each other anymore. Go home to invent another lie to your wife about what you were doing and then fuck her. Just go away."

John sighed, "But I love you…"

"I know you always have. You just don't care."

"That's something stupid to say. It's impossible to love without caring."

"I don't know. Maybe you just don't care about anything. Now go."

"Is that what you want? Fine." John buttoned his shirt and put on his shoes again as he left the flat with anger.

When Paul McCartney was left alone in the living room a thick tear rolled down his cheek. He felt awful. Why did he keep along with being romantically involved with his married ex-band mate? It all happened so fast. It began when John was drunk and appeared in Paul's flat, some months ago.

* * *

_**Paul's P.O.V. Three months ago.**_

_I was reading in the living room, it was late night and I couldn't sleep. I was trying to concentrate as much as possible to Stevenson's 'Strange case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde', when I heard someone opening fiercely the door. I got up really nervous and started walking slowly. To my surprise, I saw my good friend John Lennon standing tipsy there. _

"_What am I doing here?" he asked moving his eyes observing my house in all directions._

_I shrugged, "I'm wondering the same."_

"_I was drinking, then I decided to go home… and I appeared… here?"_

"_You're too drunk, John. Where's Yoko?"_

"_At home, I think."_

"_You think?"_

"_Agh, we were fighting and I just took the bloody keys and headed to a bar to drink."_

"_There are things about yourself that'll never change, huh? Always drinking when you're upset or mad… And speaking of keys, how the hell did you enter my building?"_

"_I made a key of this place a while ago."_

"_When? I don't remember."_

_He laughed jokingly, "I'm a stalker, y'know…"_

"_What?"_

_John rolled his eyes, "Nevermind."_

"_Want me to drive you home?"_

"_No, Yoko's going to get really upset if she sees me drunk."_

"_I think she's already angry enough because you left the house."_

"_I'll just make it up to her with some hot sex."_

_I just rolled my eyes._

"_So, I'm going to sleep here," said John affirming, more than asking._

"_You can have the couch."_

"_No thanks, I prefer the bed."_

"_I can't sleep well in the couch; I need my bed, John."_

"_I can't sleep well in the couch, either."_

_I made my point, "You can fucking sleep well everywhere."_

_He grinned, "Then we'll both have the bed."_

"_Why can't you just sleep in the bloody couch?"_

"_Oh c'mon! We always shared bed while touring, and when you had nightmares when we were little…"_

"_Well ok, but if you start moving too much, I'll kick you out."_

"_You won't."_

"_You should get some sleep now; you'll have a big hangover tomorrow."_

"_Aren't you going too?"_

"_I think I'm going to keep reading in the living room."_

"_Accompany me." He requested._

"_Fine,"_

_We both lay in my bed like we used to before, and John just commented, "It's comfy"_

"_Thanks, I guess."_

_He yawned and covered himself with the blanket. "So, how's life?"_

"_I'm composing songs for my new album."_

"_More silly love songs?"_

"_At least I'm doing something."_

"_And you think I'm doing nothing?"_

"_Just shut up and sleep."_

"_Do you miss me?"_

"_What do you mean?"_

"_Us… I mean, y'know… being as close as we were before, and stuff…"_

"_Do you?"_

_He confessed, "Kind of."_

"_Me too… Haven't really talked much recently."_

"_We should keep in touch."_

_We kept talking about silly things of life, when he leaned closer and rested his head in my chest, feeling my heart pumping. "Remember when we used to fall asleep like this?" _

_I smiled at the memories, "How can I ever forget?"_

"_What happened to us?" asked the older man snuggling closer to me._

"_I'm sure you know exactly what happened. Don't want to get into details or we'll end up fighting."_

_He didn't reply that, just closed his eyes and whispered, "I love you."_

"_I know you do."_

_He kissed my forehead gently and fell asleep in my arms while I caressed his long auburn hair. We hadn't had a moment like this since too much time, and we both really missed being like this: two best friends sharing golden moments in life. _

_The next morning when I woke up, he wasn't by my side anymore. He had gone; but left a little note on top of my nightstand… just like he did __in__ the old times when he woke up early and had to leave._

_**Thank you for everything, Macca. See you again soon?**_

_And that's how it all began… Or re-started… We kept seeing each other frequently, and before I knew, I found myself kissing John Lennon's lips with eager. What was happening? John had officially become for the second time my secret lover._

* * *

When John Lennon arrived to his house, he was upset for what he heard from Paul's mouth; but he knew James Paul McCartney had all the rights to say every word he spoke. He was tired and wanted to just lie in bed to fall asleep; maybe that way he would wake up with his mind clear. John opened the door of the building, took the elevator and finally got in his apartment, were his wife was watching TV in the living room. When she heard the footsteps from his husband, she quickly minimized the volume from the television, and calmly said, "You're finally home."

"That's right, darling."

She quickly asked, "Where have you been?"

"I told ya I was visiting McCartney 'cause he's staying in New York for a few days."

"You always find a different excuse to go out without me. Is something wrong, John?"

"Not at all, hon…"

She smiled and offered, "Want to cuddle and watch the telly together? It's been a long time since we don't do that."

"I'm very tired, I really want to sleep."

"Oh, it's ok, then."

John kissed Yoko's cheek and made his way to their bedroom. His brain needed to shut down for a little, but something didn't allow him to fall asleep. He had so much to think about, and so many decisions to make. He felt like he was hurting a lot of people; and he was, indeed.

Paul didn't deserve any of it; and neither Yoko. He was trapped, he needed to find an escape to solve all his problems, but what would be the best decision?

Ending his thing with Paul and staying with Yoko without cheating was the most reasonable thing he could do; but was he really willing to do that?


	2. Chapter 2

John was fighting himself to get some sleep; he needed to rest and forget about everything for at least some hours. When he was finally falling asleep, he felt how his wife was getting under the covers and resting her head in a pillow. Yoko looked at John, who was almost completely asleep without moving his body and eyes completely closed, with worried eyes. She wanted to know what was going on inside his husband's head. She had been noticing for some time ago that he was kind of distant of her. The Asian wondered if another woman was getting in the picture, but she tried not to think that. Was she losing John? Did she already lose him?

The next morning, when John woke up, he noticed Yoko was still sleeping and went to the kitchen to prepare something for breakfast. He wasn't good at cooking at all; he always burned everything, even the eggs; but he could manage to get something for the day's first meal, and he knew how to prepare some stuff. He remembered the way breakfast used to be ten years ago, when he was a Beatle and was always touring and had to sleep in lots of hotels. George would always say he's hungry since the very first minute he's awake, Ringo would say something totally random, Paul would be the last to wake up, but he'd end up preparing the breakfast, and John would always say: "_Delicious as always, Macca."_ As he was remembering his old-times breakfasts, a slight smile appeared in his face as he took a carton of milk from the fridge. Apparently, cereal was going to be today's breakfast for him.

_I have to go and tell Paulie I'm sorry for being an idiot to him. _That thought crossed Lennon's mind when a spoonful of cereal was touching his mouth. He finished his breakfast quickly, put on his shoes and searched for the keys. Where were the freaking keys? Their bedroom, he remembered.

He opened the bedroom door slowly and saw his Asian wife reading something lying on the bed.

"G'morning. Didn't know you were awake." John said, searching for the keys with his eyes.

"Good morning, honey. Are you hungry? Let's prepare some breakfast." Yoko smiled, noticing the look John was showing.

"I already ate, but thank you." John's voice was neutral, somehow annoyed and eager to grab the keys and get out.

"Something wrong? I'm not blind, John. I know something's bothering you."

"Nothing's wrong… I just… Where are the keys?" John abruptly changed the topic leaving her confused.

"Where are you going?"

"Paul's."

"To Paul's again? I don't know if I can believe you anymore. Is there another girl?"

"There isn't any other girl!" John quickly exclaimed, making the older woman roll his eyes.

"Don't lie to me, John. Who do you think you are? Is that something normal for you? Cheating on all your wives?" Yoko was losing control of the situation. She knew John had someone else and couldn't stand seeing him trying to cover everything with lies. She was sure she'd make him confess.

John obviously didn't know what to answer or how to react. "Don't involve Cynthia on this!"

"Can't you see you're hurting me?" When John heard those words coming from his wife's mouth, he realised this was way harder than he imagined. Why did he always have to hurt everyone?

"Please be honest with me." The woman begged, her voice cracking, wanting to cry, but she didn't.

"You're right… I haven't been completely sincere with you, and I…" He stopped for a few seconds looking for the right words in his head. He knew this was going to be a total disaster, but he couldn't keep lying, or he'd end up losing everything. "I don't know how this happened so fast… It just happened. Like when we met and I immediately fell in love with you…"

Yoko Ono knew he was starting out talking soft, using kind words and remembering their past, because then he'd announce something terrible; but she didn't reply. She let John take his time to say everything.

"And I don't want to keep lying, hurting or giving you false expectations… So, I guess you want me to go directly to the point…" John made another pause, and Yoko was starting to get a little desperate. Why he couldn't just say it?

"John, for God's sake! Just say it!" Yoko's voice wasn't so calm anymore; in fact, she was going hysterical.

"You want me to just say it? All right then: I've been cheating."

"I KNEW IT! I knew there was another girl, and you just kept lying!_"_

"I didn't lie, I just hid the true. It's not exactly a woman the one I've been cheating you with." John hit those words and she didn't know how to react. The last thing you ever expect from your husband is him cheating you with another lad.

"So you are gay now?" she pronounced those words with disgust. Not because she had something against homosexuals; but because the thought of ever asking that to her husband never crossed her mind.

"I think I've always been." he just replied that, doing his best effort to stay calm. He knew this was harder for her than it was going to be for him.

"What do you mean by that? I thought you loved me!"

"Of course I loved you, and I do! It's just that… not in _that _way anymore. I guess it is happening the same thing that happened to me with Cyn, but in very different circumstances." John explained not sure if she got what he meant.

"Who's him? Are you going to tell me now where you go when you say you're going to see Paul?" she asked, wanting him to directly answer.

"That wasn't a lie, actually. Paul is the guy." John finally confessed.

"PAUL?! PAUL?! When you left the band you two fussed and fought, and practically hated each other… and now you're telling me you're lovers?" Yoko screamed, hitting and pronouncing clearly every syllable.

"What? I never hated him; we've always loved each other. In fact, you used to get very jealous of our friendship back in my last Beatle years. Paul had been my lover even before the band was famous! We kept everything in secret. When I decided to break up with Cyn because of you... I also ended up my romance with him!"

"Me? He was the one being fucking jealous about everything! He never accepted you had grown up and fallen in love with a woman. Was he expecting you to be a fucking Beatle forever?! I saved you!"

"The Beatles saved me too, you know? If it wasn't for them, I would have been a failure in life."

They both had scrambled feelings that led them to shout at each other over the most insignificant things. He knew that that wasn't the way of discussing. John talked about _Give peace a chance, _and all that stuff, and was now shouting at his wife? That obviously wasn't the right thing to do. John Lennon wasn't the kind of guy that did the things the way they are supposed to be; but _Life is very short and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend._

"Let's stop screaming, ok? It's not right." John inhaled deep breath and calmed down.

"But cheating is?" Yoko calmed down a little too, but it seemed so difficult to her, and all she wanted to do was scream.

"Can we please have a decent conversation? Like when we started talking today?" He asked, holding her by her shoulders, leading her to calm down a little more.

"There's nothing to talk about. Just tell me, what are you going to do?" She firmly asked.

"What am I going to do about what?"

"If you truly want to save what's left of this, you can stay, try to fix things, and never in your life cheat again. But if that's not what you want, I don't deserve to live with a man lying to me every day." Her voice showed how dead serious she was about it.

"I'm really sorry…"

"You're not, and I know you're leaving. Go now please."

"I cannot just walk away like this…"

"Your original plan wasn't visiting Paul today? Go now, I don't care if you need something from here; just go away. I want to be alone." she demanded, pointing the door with her finger.

"But…"

"Are you deaf, John Winston? GO NOW!"

He quickly grabbed the keys and left the building with lots of thoughts in his head. John felt really bad for Yoko, and of course, they still had more things to talk about to end the relationship well, the way it's supposed to be.

He turned on the car and headed to Paul's.

_I'm going to pack my stuff to go to live with Paul. I'll apologize about everything and show how much I utterly love him. _

His head was invaded between the thoughts of how bad he felt for Yoko and how much she didn't deserve what he'd done; but also the happiness of surprising Paul telling he's staying with him.


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N I am so sorry this chapter is so short! And my last update with this story was almost a month ago...**_

_**Anyway, you know I said that Paul dind't marry Linda in this story? I decided to change things a bit. They married, but then divorced. Paul has his two girls Stella and Mary, and John has Julian. I didn't include Sean.**_

John Lennon's heart was beating at such speed, having all those feelings melting inside.

_It won't be long till I belong to you. _

He knocked the door with trembling hands, and when Paul opened it, they stayed quiet for a minute or two looking at each other, until the younger broke the silence to enunciate a cold "You." His voice didn't show hope, joy or madness. Just a single word said without any feeling.

John forced a smile, and without knowing what to answer to Paul's syllable, pronounced, "Yes, me…"

Another couple of minutes of awkward silence passed by, when McCartney decided to go directly to the point asking, "What did you come for?"

"I came to stay." John declared, making Paul cross his arms.

"Explain yourself." The coldness was still present in the younger's voice.

"I told Yoko about us. I want to stay with you, for real. I know I have made lots of bad decisions in my life, but I'm sure about this. I want to stay and live with you, Paulie. I know I don't deserve you, and you have waited and expected tons of things from me and I have let you down a thousand times; but you can't imagine how much I regret it now. No one can make me as happy as you do. I don't know if asking for your forgiveness is already too much… But I love you, darling, you know I do. I don't want to keep screwing everything. I want to do things right; but I don't want to do it alone. I need you by my side…" John meant every word he said, speaking utterly the truth and waiting for Paul's response while a tear came down his cheek. The younger man didn't reply anything for a moment, just stood looking at his all-time friend seeing in his tearful eyes all the regret and sorrow the other man had.

"Was that all true?" Paul asked firmly, but showing a kind of sweet voice.

"The sincerest words I found."

"Because if I give you another chance, it would be the last one."

"I won't let you down again, Macca."

"You better not, or I swear God this will be officially over." Paul's voice cracked as he removed from his eyes a little tear.

"That's a yes?" John smiled, getting closer to him.

"That's an 'I'll-give-you-another-chance-but-if-you-screw-it-up-you're-dead.'" He stepped another move to the man with the circle-shaped glasses.

"I won't screw it up, but if by any chance that happens, I'll suicide, or give you a revolver for you to do it." John firmly stated, sounding like he wasn't joking at all, but then stepped closer to caress gently the younger man's long hair, and corrected what he previously said, "No, I won't let you kill me, because you may go to jail and I don't want that for you. So yes, I'll kill myself."

Paul tittered at John's statement and grabbed him by his neck, "You know I didn't mean it that literal. But really, don't screw it up."

John continued caressing Paul's hair and looking him tenderly, as his lips were approaching closer to McCartney's, and after a soft, warm and long kiss, pronounced, "Never again."

After a couple of hours of chatting, cuddling and kissing, Paul felt the need to ask, "What are we going to do?"

John didn't know what was Paul talking about, but he knew something was concerning him, "Do about what, Macca?"

"About us. I mean, you said you were staying with me. Does that mean we're going to live together as a couple?"

"Indeed."

"Where are we going to live?"

Lennon pecked McCartney's cheek, "Wherever you want. I don't care where I am as long as I'm with you."

"Well… My actual house is in London. We can live there. And also, you should go and see Cynthia and Julian. You only see your son like two times a year. That's not fair for him. I also can't be too much time away from Mary and Stella."

"My dear Jules…" John sobbed, placing his head in his love's shoulder, "Why do I always screw everything?"

"You still have time to fix things with him. But he's twelve years old, it will require of your time. You know how difficult dealing with teenagers is."

"That's why you're going to help me." He smiled at the younger man and he smiled back.

"So, we're going back to London… together… that's… crazy… I mean, I never thought something like this would happen."

"I promise I'll move to London with you whenever I divorce Yoko and talk with her about everything…"

"And you need to pack your things…"

"Yeah… Yoko was mad so she literally threw me out of the Dakota…"

"Do you want me to go with you? That way I can calmly talk with her too…" Paul proposed, but John seemed to not agree with his idea.

"That would make things worse. I really prefer not."

"Alright, but you have to go."

They were both sitting in the couch, and John stretched his arms, curling himself to Paul, "Tomorrow," he kissed Paul's forehead, declaring, "Today I just want to be with you."

That was the beginning of a very important decision. The affirmation and determination of a love that was born so many years ago.

_**A/N Thank you for reading. (:**_


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N I know I haven't updated since some time, but I really wanted to continue this...**_

John Lennon woke up smiling at the fact that he was being held by Paul so tight he couldn't even move, but he liked it that way. Paul was showing in one way or another that he didn't want to ever let John go, and the thought of the older man disappointing him again was something Paul wanted to forget about.

Paul's breathing was calm and peaceful, and he was still sleeping, not showing any interest in waking up yet.

John didn't mind that at all. Of course he couldn't get out of the bed because Paul was holding him, and couldn't turn around to face him and analyze his sleep; but something about Paul's arms covering his laying body made a lot of thoughts cross his mind. Those arms were a sign of property, love, fear, protection and safety. It seemed like they would always feel safe on each other arms.

How did everything happen? Since they met in 1957 they've been inseparable, until the Beatles broke up in 1970. The breakup of the band was also like a "divorce" between Lennon and McCartney. Yoko Ono became the new most important thing in the guitarist's life.

Now, as he was being held by the former bassist of The Beatles, John Lennon wondered what would have happened _if _he had ended his relationship with Yoko at the end of the 60s? What would have happened if the Beatles were still together as a band? Maybe they needed to split up for him to realize all of these. Maybe Yoko was only a phase in his life; a phase that determined many aspects of it. But everything has its end, right?

In this moment, John Lennon only wanted to think about the man holding him. He pushed away every other thought bothering him and focused in the younger man and his endless love for him.

Paul yawned and loosened the pressure of his arms against John, who quickly turned around to face him. "G'morning, Macca."

Paul smiled and yawned again, "What a lovely way of waking up," he rubbed his eyes, "When did you wake up?"

"Like an hour ago or a little more." John kissed the tip of Paul's nose. "Had all these time to think of you."

"And what do you think when you think of me?"

"Of how a lucky bastard I am to have you, how good you are to me, how tenderly you hold me in your arms, how much I infinitely and utterly love you, how you have always inspired me, how I can feel your breath when you sleep, how neat and meticulous you are, how your voice is my favorite thing to hear… And I could go on for the eternity without finishing…"

Paul blushed and giggled after hearing John's reply. "You're adorable."

He leaned to peck Paul's lips, "No, _you _are."

Paul smirked, "Yes, I am…" and added, "But you are more…"

"I don't think so, love…" John grinned and unbuttoned Paul's pajama shirt while tickled his neck and chest.

Paul laughed and begged, "John! Stop!"

John giggled, "You've always been so ticklish, Macca…"

"Please, stop Johnny…!"

"Not until you admit you're the adorable one…"

"But I'm not!..." He complained, "Hey! Not the nipples!"

John laughed and raised an eyebrow, "No?"

"Stop tickling and kiss me. Better plan, don't you think?"

John finally stopped, "So you want me to kiss you?"

Paul nodded, "Please."

John teased, "Please _what_?"

"Please, John."

"Please John _what_?"

"Please kiss me, John."

John smiled and pressed his rough lips into Paul's softer ones, tasting the younger's mouth and tongue adding intensity to the kiss. "Happy now?"

Paul shook his head, "Not yet. That wasn't enough."

John grinned and smirked, "Well… In that case…"

The man with the auburn hair placed little kisses in Paul's neck while sucking a bit of skin. He continued exploring and tasting Paul's jaw until his mouth found the left-handed's chest, which John quickly showered with kisses, and later tried tangling his fingers within Paul's thin and little chest hair.

John inquired, "Better now?"

"What do you think?"

"I think you're hungry." John affirmed, "I can hear your ribs."

"I guess I should make us something to eat, then."

"Or we can order a pizza…"

"That's a good option too… I really don't feel like getting up from the bed today…"

* * *

"We are truly the walruses, John… We only stepped a foot out of the bed to get the pizza and now we're here again…" Paul said snuggling closer to John and finishing the last slice.

"Let's hear whatever's playing on the radio." John suggested. "It's right here in the nightstand so I don't really have to move."

"Remember how we used to love the radio as kids? I would come home from school, lie on the bed and listen to the radio for hours and hours…"

"But there were only like two radio shows, and then when we first came to America and found out about the multiple radio stations, we went crazy about it! We phoned every radio station asking them to play the Ronettes."

"Even Brian had to stop us…"

"Eppy… Do you really think he killed himself _on porpoise?_"

"No," Paul planted a kiss on John's forehead. "I'm sure he didn't think he was going to get _that _far with whatever he did that took his life…"

John turned on the little radio, and a charismatic voice sounded through the speakers.

'_**Hello again, ladies and gentlemen! On this edition of the show we decided to make a little tribute to the emblematic music of the 60s. What a great decade! Let's hear a little about four lads that can be considered the leaders of that decade… Or should we call it, THE BEATLE DECADE!**_

The guitar strums and drum kicks started to sound in a very familiar way to both of them, who smiled at the memories of writing their first Number One song in America…

_**Oh yeah I'll tell you something**_

_**I'll think you'll understand,**_

_**When I say that something,**_

_**I want to hold your hand!**_

_**I want to hold your hand,**_

_**I want to hold your hand**_

They were both singing along with the record; the one that decided they were going to arrive to a new continent from them at the time.

_**Oh please say to me**_

_**You'll let me be your man,**_

_**And please say to me**_

_**You'll let me hold your hand**__**  
**__**You'll let me hold your hand**_

_**I want to hold your hand**_

Without even thinking two times about, they were both clapping along with the recording. The claps on the 1963 song were something that seemed so clever for them. What other band would add the sound of hands clamping in a recording?

_**And when I touch you I feel happy inside**_

_**It's such a feeling that my love**_

_**I can't hide,**_

_**I can't hide,**_

_**I can't hide**__**  
**__**Yeah, you got that something**_

_**I think you'll understand**_

_**When I say that something**_

_**I want to hold your hand**__**  
**__**I want to hold your hand**_

_**I want to hold your hand**__**  
**__**And when I touch you I feel happy inside**_

_**It's such a feeling that my love**_

_**I can't hide, **_

_**I can't hide, **_

_**I can't hide**__**  
**__**Yeah, you got that something**_

_**I think you'll understand**_

_**When I feel that something**_

_**I want to hold your hand**__**  
**__**I want to hold your hand**_

_**I want to hold your hand**_

_**I want to hold your hand**_

"Remember when we wrote it in the house of Jane's parents?"

"How can I not? We were fooling with the piano when I hit a chord and you were like, '_That's it! Do it again!'_"

_**I'm sure you all know that song, don't you? We will play more of the Fabs today in the show! Because yeah... They are still the Fabs! I actually think they will always be the Fabs… No, I'm sure of it!**_

_**There are places I remember**__**  
All my life, though some have changed**__**  
Some forever not for better**__**  
Some have gone and some remain**__**  
All these places have their moments**__**  
With lovers and friends I still can recall**__**  
Some are dead and some are living**__**  
In my life I've loved them all**_

Paul exclaimed, "You wrote that!"

"My first master-piece… I was very proud of it when I wrote it…"

_**But of all these friends and lovers**__**  
There is no one compares with you**__**  
And these memories lose their meaning**__**  
When I think of love as something new**__**  
Though I know I'll never lose affection**__**  
For people and things that went before**__**  
I know I'll often stop and think about them**__**  
In my life I love you more**_

_**Though I know I'll never lose affection**__**  
For people and things that went before**__**  
I know I'll often stop and think about them**__**  
In my life I love you more**__**  
In my life I love you more**_

"Paulie, did I ever mention that you were my inspiration to write _'In my life'_?"

"You must be kidding."

"Do I sound like I am kidding? For whom else do you think it was?"

"For no one in specific… I mean, I don't know…"

John smiled, "Well, now you know it's for you…"

"And I have to confess that '_Two of Us' _is about you and me… Not about Linda and I like I used to say…"

"I know it. Everyone does… T_wo of us riding nowhere, spending someone's hard earned pay… _Never sounded like a song for her… I have always known it was for me… It's beautiful, love…"

"_Oh! Darling _and _Get Back _were like secret messages for you…"

John smiled sadly, "_Oh! Darling _is heartbreaking… Darn it, I can't believe how much harm I have done you…"

Paul sang the line, "_When you told me you didn't need me anymore, well you know I nearly broke down and cried…"_

John kissed Paul's hair, "But now I got back to where I once belonged…"

"That's right, Jojo!"

_**What a lovely romantic song! Let's hear the last Beatles song for today's show…**_

Paul cheerfully questioned, "Ooohh… What will it be?"

John chuckled, "Probably your baby, _Yesterday._"

_**This one, like many songs of the Beatles, is an excellent contribution between the best songwriting duo in history! Lennon and McCartney! **_

_**I read the news today, oh boy**_  
_**About a lucky man who made the grade**__**  
And though the news was rather sad**__**  
Well, I just had to laugh**__**  
I saw the photograph**__**  
He blew his mind out in a car**__**  
He didn't notice that the lights had changed**__**  
A crowd of people stood and stared**__**  
They'd seen his face before**__**  
Nobody was really sure if he was from the house of lords**_

John laughed, "I can't believe there are freaks that actually think that's a subliminal message of me announcing your death…"

Paul joked, "Well you know… My bare feet in the Abbey Road cover is _surely _a message saying that I am really dead because corpses get buried shoeless…"

_**I saw a film today oh, boy**__**  
The English army had just won the war**__**  
A crowd of people turned away**__**  
But I just had to look**__**  
Having read the book**__**  
I'd love to turn you on.**_

John grinned cockily, "_A day in the life _rules! It has to be the best psychedelic song in history!"

"Here comes my part!"

Woke up, fell out of bed

_**Dragged a comb across my head**__**  
Found my way downstairs and drank a cup**__**  
And looking up, I noticed I was late**__**  
Found my coat and grabbed my hat**__**  
Made the bus in seconds flat**__**  
Found my way upstairs and had a smoke**__**  
And somebody spoke and I went into a dream**__**  
Ah**_

"It's wicked awesome that we both wrote the different parts separately and then mixed them!"

I read the news today oh, boy

_**Four thousand holes in Blackburn, Lancashire**__**  
And though the holes were rather small**__**  
They had to count them all**__**  
Now they know how many holes it takes to fill the Albert hall**__**  
I'd love to turn you on**_

John held Paul's hand and looked the younger man directly to his brown eyes, "Let's write together again, Macca."

"That's been my dream since 1970!"

"The man on the radio is right! We are the best songwriting duo ever! We need to write again, Paulie! Let's record a new album together!"

Paul smiled happily, "I would love that very much!"

"We can make even greater things than the work we've done before!"

Paul proposed, "Let's call Geo and Rings!"

"Do you mean… _Re-uniting _the Beatles?"

"Yes! Why not?"

"I don't know… I mean… We don't know what they would think… They probably don't want to… And what if it doesn't work out?"

"_We can work it out, we can work it out…_"

John worriedly asked, "But what if it _doesn't _and then we split up for the _second _time!"

"We haven't asked them yet and you're already worried about having a second split up John…"

"I just don't want you to go through another breakup…"

"Don't worry, Johnny… Let's start writing a song now, what do you think?"

John's head was spinning at all the information he had received on the past hours. He didn't want to let Paul down and he wasn't sure the re-unite of the Beatles would be the best idea; although it surely excited the man.

He left Yoko, decided to stay with Paul and live in London again, promised himself he was going to visit Cynthia and Julian and gain his son's confidence, and now Paul said something about the comeback of the Beatles… It seemed crazy. Too many important decisions have been taken in very little time, and he also had to have a decent talk with Yoko, pack his things and sign the divorce papers.

Nevertheless, Paul's plan seemed flawless. Will it really work out the way the couple expects?

_**A/N Thank you for reading!**_

_**Please let me know what you think! I'll get very happy if you review (:**_


	5. Chapter 5

John Lennon met Yoko Ono in the office destined to the signature of their divorce paper. They both wanted to do it as quick as possible and move on with life, although John apparently already had.

The news of finding out his husband was cheating on her with his friend from Liverpool, and then decided to stay with him instead of trying to fix their relationship, was something hard for the woman. And who could blame her?

They signed the papers in complete silence; you could hear pens scripting paper, a clock marking the hour and the typical sounds of New York City in the afternoon, but no sound was being emitted by any mouth in the room. Not even the judge in charge of executing, making legal and witness the dissolution of marriage could manage to say something, because the looks of pressure in both of them eyes was a clear signal that it was clever staying silent.

John was feeling a mixture of guilt and excitement. He wanted so bad to say something to Yoko, but she looked like she might kill someone in the next hour if someone opened the mouth to say something, and he didn't want a discussion to come out of this. However, was it really going to end like that? Without them not having a decent talk? No, John wasn't going to have that.

The judge made the work easier for John by breaking the silence first, "Umm… Well, now you're legally not-wife and not-husband anymore… I think I should leave you two alone…" He made his way out of the room leaving John and Yoko alone in the white walls of the office.

John began, "We need to talk."

Yoko analyzed his ex-husband for some seconds before opening her mouth to say coldly, "About what?"

"About this."

"There's nothing left to talk, John. We're not married anymore. You may pack your things, I'm keeping the apartment."

"Yes, I may pack my things… I'm moving to London."

She rolled her eyes, "Good for you."

John forced a smile, "I want to end this the right way. Let me invite you a coffee and you can ask me whatever you want."

"I really prefer not. But thank you. I'll leave now."

That was it. The second divorce paper John had signed in his life, and hopefully the last one. Just like when he divorced Cynthia, he was doing this because he _wanted _to. All his thoughts and feelings of guilt about Yoko vanished at the mere idea of the man waiting for him at _home._

* * *

Paul McCartney was watching television in the living room of his flat, but his mind was somewhere else. He could only think about John and Yoko. He was divorcing her because of _him. _How could he face her again? Eventually he would have to see her again one day; but that wasn't what was worrying him the most. What if something went wrong with the divorce? What if John backed down?

Suddenly, he heard the sound of keys opening the door and the voice of the man he love shouting, "I'm back!"

Paul turned off the TV and ran quickly to the door to greet the older man. The eagerness in John's voice made him already know he had nothing to be afraid of.

The left-handed man greeted him with a lovable smile and John whispered in return, "I missed you…"

Paul flashed him another smile and kissed him lazily, "You only left for some hours…"

"What can I tell you, Macca? I need you always by my side." He gave Paul a quick peck. "Now please help me with the suitcases, darling."

Paul didn't notice there were a lot of bags and suitcases tossed all over the floor behind the door of the apartment.

"Sure!" He smiled and helped John to take the suitcases into the apartment.

Once they finished, Paul held John into a hug and whispered, "I love you…"

John buried his nose in Paul's hair and whispered back, "I know you love me… But I love you more…"

"Impossible."

John raised an eyebrow and kissed his forehead, "You think?"

"I _know._"

"I doubt."

"You doubt what?"

"That you love me more than I do."

None of them was ever going to let the other win this discussion; they knew that for sure.


	6. Chapter 6

_So, this is it. _John thought. _Goodbye New York._

Today was the day. The plane tickets from New York to London had today's date. John and Paul were both supposed to get up early, though John hardly got any sleep. He spent all those hours staring blankly at the roof of the bedroom, like he was fighting a battle with his eyes to close them, but they refused to obey.

But why couldn't he manage to get a decent sleep?

Was he _confused_? No, not at all.

_Thrilled _could be the appropriate word. In a few hours he was leaving the city he learned to love in a very short period of time. And how could someone not love New York City? The rush and noise of it was never something John complained about; in fact, he _loved _it. He loves life in a city that literally _never _sleeps. And how could someone not love living in the world capital of art? All the famous art galleries are there! All kinds of artists, ― painters, actors, musicians, writers, ― they all dream about the city and sometimes get blind by its splendor.

New York is the city where a lot of dreams are made and crashed.

But that was a thought that was far from John's mind. All his dreams came true, really. He had all he ever dreamt about. Having succeed in a band wasn't all he wanted back in 1960? And he surely made it; he accomplished the sky with The Beatles.

Nevertheless, a very important thing about dreams is that they either get wickeder or simpler while you keep growing. Ambition is as much important as air for a person. A person without ambition is _nobody._

Right now, John had many ambitions that didn't seem too hard to accomplish. Or were they?

Was he afraid? Of course he was! Leaving New York City and embracing London again as his home could be seen as a comeback to the past. He had so many things he had to work on, for example, his relation with Julian.

Had he been a good father? Of course not. The succeed of The Beatles also seemed his failure as a dad.

Was it the Beatles' fault? Of course not. It was _his _fault and only _his. _He could have _cared_ more. How could he complain about his own father when he had never been the ideal dad for Julian? How many months have passed since the last time he saw his son? John didn't even know the answer to that question, and it was scaring him.

He also had to think about what he was going to say to Cynthia. That girl literally sacrificed _everything _to allow him to follow his dreams. He owed a lot to her. And how did he pay her? Not in the best way, that's for sure.

All those feelings and thoughts were attacking John's mind. But why now? Why couldn't he see in the past all the things he can see now? It's like being with Paul opened his eyes. Yes, that's probably it.

John was leaving the city of lights to grow new dreams and create new memories in London. The thought of recording new Lennon/McCartney tracks for the first time in years was something he was looking forward to. He w_anted _to be in the studio so bad. And Paul's idea about calling George and Ringo? It was something crazy! There was _no way _for The Beatles to be back again on the studio working for a new LP. Or was it?

John's head was literally aching because of all the information crossing through his mind at the same time. It was madness!

Paul, in the other side, was sleeping silently embracing a pillow. Staring at the younger man for a while seemed to be what he needed to calm down his mind for a while.

'_God, how much I love you.' _John smiled at the thought and planted a kiss on Paul's forehead. Apparently he was now ready to get some sleep.

_Riiiiiiiiiing!_

The alarm clock sounded just when John decided it was time to sleep. But he could sleep in the plane, couldn't he?

He kept staring at Paul for a few minutes. The alarm clock didn't make an effect on the sleeping man, who was still in a deep phase of the sleep and didn't hear anything.

John wanted to wake him up in a special way, and what better way to wake up than with music?

John sang the lyrics to one of the songs of The Beatles,

_**Good day sunshine,**__**  
**__**Good day sunshine,**__**  
**__**Good day sunshine.**__**  
**__**I need to laugh, and when the sun is out**__**  
**__**I've got something I can laugh about,**__**  
**__**I feel good, in a special way.**__**  
**__**I'm in love and it's a sunny day.**_

Paul frowned and snuggled closer to the pillow.

_**Good day sunshine,**__**  
**__**Good day sunshine,**__**  
**__**Good day sunshine.**__**  
**__**We take a walk, the sun is shining down,**__**  
**__**Burns my feet as they touch the ground.**_

The left-handed yawned and rubbed his eyes.

_****__**Good day sunshine,**__**  
**__**Good day sunshine.**__**  
**__**And then we lie, beneath a shady tree,**__**  
**__**I love him and he's loving me.**__**  
**__**He feels good, he knows he's looking fine.**__**  
**__**I'm so proud to know that he is mine.**_

The younger man smiled and blew a kiss to the other man singing.

_**Good day sunshine,**__**  
**__**Good day sunshine,**__**  
**__**Good day sunshine.**_

"That was lovely, John!"

John chuckled, "You sing it way better than me, but I just had to try,"

"What a lovely way of waking up!"

"By seeing your face? Of course, Macca."

"Silly," Paul giggled.

"Maybe, but you love me."

"I do. Madly."

* * *

_The pilot and the whole PanAm agency are more than happy to welcome you to the 34-D plane, destined to arrive in the London Heathrow airport in more or less seven hours. The flight attendants will be there for you if you need any help. We all hope you have a pleasant flight. Thank you for choosing us!_

"Thank God this is a private flight." Paul said.

"Yeah, thanks to Johnny who managed to find a private one,"

"So what are we going to do in these seven hours?"

John grinned, "Mmm… I've never made love in a plane, you see…"

"Really?"

"Yeah… It's kinda sad, you know…"

"Aw, honey," Paul kissed his cheek. "That's definitely _not _going to change today."

"Why not?"

"We're on a fucking plane!"

"I'm sure the pilot won't mind," John insisted.

Paul ordered, "Just close your eyes!"

"And you'll kiss me?"

"Try to sleep; I'm sure you're tired."

"I don't want to sleep!" John crossed his arms stubbornly.

"Well, but _I _do. And you do too."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I know you didn't get any sleep last night, and you have bags under your eyes,"

"But I want to make love!"

"Not now!"

"Yes, now!" John begged.

Paul ignored John's plea and offered instead, "You can sleep in my lap if you want,"

The rest of the hours passed quickly for the two men. The older was snoring in the other's lap, and at the same time, the younger had fallen asleep with his head resting on the other's shoulder.


	7. Chapter 7

The two had arrived to Paul's house in London about an hour ago.

'_Now this is my house too…' _John smiled at the thought.

They were unpacking everything, making a few arrangements to the house, cleaning and making it an even tidier place.

"I'd never been in this place before," John commented.

"I bought it when I divorced Lin."

"I see…"

"I need to see my girls, John."

"I know," John nodded. "We'll go tomorrow."

"No. I need to go now."

"You must be tired from the flight, the airport, the unpacking, and everything, love… You should rest and wait for tomorrow."

"You don't understand… I haven't seen them since the last time I flew to New York to see you. I've called them, and everything, but it's not the same. They miss me, I miss them. I feel like a bad father. I need to go now." Paul said determined.

"Let's go now, then." He smiled.

"I think you should go to see Cyn and Jules while I go to see my girls."

"I prefer to go with you… I'm scared," John admitted.

"Scared of what?"

"Scared of what he will think! He may hate me! How many times do you think I called my son when I lived with Yoko?"

"That's why you should go alone this time, John. Can't you see? I'm sure he wants a time alone with his dad. I'll go with you another day. I can assure you something: you're going to be a big part in the life of your son, we're going to visit him frequently, and Lin, Stella, Mary, Heather, Cyn, Jules, you and I are going to be a big family."

"A big family, huh?" John smiled.

"Well, I can't really assure you that… but I can assure you that you will see your son frequently. It's not too late, John."

* * *

_**John's P.O.V **_

_Soon Paul left, and now, being alone in the place I'll easily and quickly learn to call home, I'm wondering how I can knock that door and say sorry to my son. I really admire that thing in Paul; he is so fond and dedicated to his family, so caring and lovely. He worries about my relationship with my son and encourages me to fix things with him and Cyn. And I will do it. I just don't know how. After all this time, how can I knock that door and say sorry? What if they really hate me? What if my son doesn't want to listen or talk to me? What if Cyn decides that the best thing for him is me not being able to see him again? Suddenly, my mind started to get full of scary 'what-ifs', until I started to think: What if he misses me and wants me to be a big part in his life? What if Paul is right and we can all be a big family? What if they really accept my apology and we all end winning?_

_I finally grabbed my coat and decided to go. Why should I wait another day? I'll never know anything if I don't take the chance. I also can't let Paulie down anymore. He trusted me on doing this._

_My worried thoughts made the road faster, and before I knew it, I was standing in front of Cynthia's house._

_What do I do know?_

_This is it. I can't go back. I need to do something._

_But what? _

_Knocking would be the first thing to do._

_I knocked very lightly a couple of times, but no one opened the door. I assume no one heard._

_I knocked again, this time a little louder._

"_Who is it?"_

_That's when I heard her voice. I completely forgot about how much I love Cynthia's smooth voice. _

_Before I could answer or say something, she opened the door and her eyes widened. It's obvious that she wasn't expecting me at all. How can I know what is going through her head right now?_

"_John?" she looked at me with confused eyes, but she didn't look angry._

"_Cyn," I smiled slightly._

"_It's been a long time. Come in,"_

_My first worries fade away at that moment. She didn't yell at me or kick me out; she just invited me to come in. I only wish I could make up all the pain I have caused to that woman._

"_So, how are you doing? I honestly wasn't expecting you at all." She said._

"_I'm doing fine, thank you." I forced a smile. "I came here for a lot of things, really… Is Julian here?"_

"_No, he's at a friend's house, but he will be here soon."_

"_We need to talk." I determinately said._

"_Well, we can sit here," she pointed at the big sofa in the living room. "Do you want coffee, tea, or something?"_

"_Not now. I just want to talk to you."_

"_I'm hearing."_

"_I'm sorry, Cyn… for everything. God, in the past I never stopped to think about how much pain I have always caused you… I'm sorry… I'm sure you hate me…" As I was talking, my voice was becoming weaker._

"_I don't hate you, John. You'll always have a special place in my heart." _

"_I don't really understand how you can not hate me after everything I've done to you. Ever since we met I've been a pain in the ass for you! I even hit you twice when we were teenagers…"_

"_But I forgave you,"_

"_You always did…" I tenderly smiled. "You sacrificed your life as an artist to take care of Julian, and I did nothing! I wasn't even there when he was born, he grew without me… I've been an awful dad…"_

"_You've certainly not been the best father of them all, but you aren't the worst either, John."_

"_You are so kind, Cyn… Thank you, really. You deserve everything in the world; you deserve a good husband, someone who threats you the way I didn't…"_

"_I'm actually dating a guy, he's good."_

"_Yeah? That's awesome, Cyn!"_

"_And you? Things are well with Yoko, I suppose."_

"_I actually divorced her. I believe it's already on the news."_

"_You divorced her? She seemed to be everything you wanted."_

"_That's what I used to think…"_

"_What made you change your mind? Or should I ask, __**who**__?" Cynthia inquired._

"_Well… It's funny how I'm slowly fixing all the injuries I did to people from the past…" I fully smiled, picturing Paul in my head._

"_I think I am getting your point, John."_

"_The thing is that I finally admitted Paul McCartney is my true love."_

"_You finally fixed everything with him? That's nice! It was really sad how you two fell apart when the band broke up."_

"_Yeah… I caused so damage to him… and I caused damage to you too… and Julian… I have caused a lot of damage to a lot of people in my life, Cyn. But it's getting better now, you see? I have a good feeling, I've got very good vibrations with the new __**me. **__I feel like a different person now… It's the feeling of something new… Like that feeling I got when 'Love Me Do' got a place in the charts. It was Number Seventeen, but it felt like a Number One! Then we made a lot of Number Ones…"_

"_You sound very happy and enthusiastic." Cyn gladly smiled._

"_That's because I am! I'm back to where I once belonged! It's just that I was always afraid of admitting that's where I always belonged."_

"_And that is?"_

"_With Paul, Cyn! Paul was always what I wanted! Paul __**is **__what I want… And now that he's mine…" I smiled mischievously._

"_So it's a serious thing, eh?"_

"_Yes." I nodded. "I moved here with him. I'm living in London now and I plan to bring Julian to my life. I'm going to be the good father I've never been."_

"_Are you serious, John?" Cynthia's eyes glowed with happiness._

"_I'm dead serious, Cyn," I smiled brightly at her._

_I couldn't say something else, and either Cynthia, because the next thing we heard were loud knocks coming from the door. "I'm here, mom! Open the door!"_

_Regrets? Fears? There was no time for that the minute I heard my son's voice after so long. My eyes lit up when I saw my twelve-year-old son running to the living room, not noticing me for a minute. But soon he noticed, and with his confused eyes Julian stared silently at me for a little less than a minute._

"_Father," he called. There was a bit of sadness and hope in his voice._

"_Son," I replied; tenderness present in my weak voice._

_He tried to avoid my eyes for a second, but failed at it; his eyes were looking straightly to mines._

"_What are you doing here?" Julian asked. He didn't say it coldly or angrily, but the question still hurt me._

"_I live in London again now, son."_

"_Oh, so you've come here to pay me a visit."_

"_Not just a simple visit, Jules. I want to be with you, take care of you, play with you, hang out with you, talk with you…"_

"_Why now?"_

"_The thing is, that you and I both now I haven't been an award-winning father," I forced a weak smile, trying to find the right words to say to him, "And you can't imagine how much I regret it now."_

"_What do you regret?" he curiously inquired._

"_A simpler question would be what do I __**not **__regret." I chuckled nervously. "But regrets are pointless, really. People can't go back in time, but they can analyze their mistakes and fix them slowly."_

"_Am I one of your mistakes? Because you once said I was born out of a whiskey bottle on a Saturday night."_

"_Oh God Jules… I'm so sorry…" my eyes soon got full of tears. How could I do this to my own son? I want him to give me a shot, but if he doesn't… I really don't have the rights to blame him._

"_Why are you crying?" he asked another of his questions. I just wish I could give him the answer he wants to everything but I know I can't._

"_Because I love you and I'm sorry." I sincerely said._

"_You love me?"_

"_Very much," I nodded._

"_How can I believe you?"_

"_I live near you now, so I will be spending a lot of time with you. I know I can't make up to you all the time we lost from the past; all I ask of you is to give me the chance to prove you that I can be a good day to you. I will do my best and I won't give up. So what do you say?"_

"_I say I missed you," Jules finally smiled, and that's all I wanted from him._

_Cynthia had been staring at the whole scene without saying a word. She eventually got up her seat, and the three of us shared a warm hug. It's not too late, isn't it? Paul was right, after all… He is __**always **__right…_


	8. Chapter 8

_**P.O.V Paul**_

_While John was visiting Cynthia and Julian, meanwhile…_

I was full of joy and blissful happiness when I knocked the door and Heather's face expression lit up of seeing me again.

"Dad!" She threw his arms to my neck and pulled me into a caring hug. "I missed you so much."

"I missed you too, dear." I smiled tenderly at her. "I missed you all a lot."

I felt a little guilty for staying away from them. Even if it was a very short period of time, they need me and I need them.

"Guess who's here!" Heather shouted, and then I saw my youngest daughters running to the living room, where I was with Heather.

"Daddy!" my five-year-old daughter exclaimed and I kneeled down to carry her.

"D-dad-ddady? A-and m-me?" Stella mumbled while he looked at Mary with jealousy because he wanted me to carry her too.

I kneeled down again and carried my youngest daughter with my other arm after kissing her forehead. "Daddy has two arms, see?"

Heather noticed I was kind of struggling with carrying them both at the same time and giggled a little. "But daddy doesn't have superhero strength and you girls have become heavier."

"Daddy has superhero strength!" Stella exclaimed and held into my neck tighter.

"I'll look for mom." Heather said. "And you will go with me, missy," she grabbed Stella. "You don't want dad to break his back, do ya?"

"B-but…" Stella complained as she grabbed Heather's hand and they both went upstairs.

I was eager to see Lin too; I still care a lot about her and she is probably the sweetest and kindest woman on Earth.

Heather and Stella came back downstairs really fast, running down really quickly.

"Watch out, girls! Don't run so fast, I don't want any of you to fall from the stairs!" that was Linda's voice.

Linda came downstairs too, wearing a pretty floral dress.

"Hello, Paul." She greeted with a bright smile. "I'm glad you're here, the girls missed you very much."

"I'm glad I'm here too," I smiled back.

"How was everything in New York?"

"Amazing… I actually have to talk to you about something… But it's so nice being back in London. Especially if I live near my girls."

"D-dad-daddy? P-play w-with me?" Mary asked messing with my hair.

"Dad and I need some time alone to talk, girls." Lin said. "Then you'll all play."

"Come on, Stella, Mary! Let's go play outside and then daddy will join us!" Heather grabbed her sisters by the hand and they went outside.

"So, Paul." Linda started and sat in the sofa. "What's that important thing you have to tell me?"

"Well, you see…" I sat in the sofa too, looking for the right words to explain everything. "I have a new partner."

"That's lovely, Paul! Do I know her?"

"Yes, you do…" I scratched my ear nervously.

"Then who's her?"

"Emmm… It's John, actually."

"John Lennon?!" something in her voice made me believe she didn't agree on this. Something made me think she was upset and she wasn't going to let me see my daughters anymore.

"The one and only." I forced smile, waiting for her to say something else.

"Then I'm happy for you. I always knew you kind of had a thing for him…" Linda smiled, and my worries faded away.

"You did?" I raised a brow comically.

"How could I not? When The Beatles broke up you spent months crying over him, drinking and smoking without getting out of the bed crying out loud how much you love him, how your life was senseless if you weren't part of The Beatles, and all that stuff. I helped you through all of that."

"Yes, I remember." I smiled sadly but at the same time sweetly at my ex-wife. "Thank you… Without you I would have probably lost my mind."

"Well, you did." Lin chuckled. "But I helped you getting your mind back."

"I'll always be thankful for that and for everything you did to me, Lin. You were the best wife I could ever ask for."

"You weren't a bad husband either, Paul. It's just that things didn't work out fine in the end between us as a couple, but we're still very good friends."

"Yeah, we are." I smiled brightly. "And that's awesome! I really care about you, Lin. You should start dating someone else."

"I'm working on it!"

"Yeah? Haven't told a word about it before!"

"Well, you didn't say a word about your romance with John either…" Lin pointed out.

"Oh, I guess you've got your point then, Lin."

"I honestly didn't want to say anything before I knew if it's something serious or not. He's a vegetarian chef too, but we're still getting to know each other, you see. Nothing settled yet." She explained.

"I wish you the best of luck!"

"And what are you going to do with your romance with John? You must be very happy."

"Oh, I _am_**.**" I smiled faintly, like a foolish teenager in love.

"And what plan have you got?"

"He moved in with me, we're both going to live here in London and we will be passing by here frequently. Like usual, I would like to take the girls with me some weekends, or maybe taking them to holiday along with Julian!"

"Julian! I haven't heard a word about him in ages. How's him?"

"I am not so sure. John is at Cyn's place right now."

"You should invite Cyn, Jules and John for dinner tomorrow!"

"Marvelous, Lin!" my childish expression of amaze at such a wonderful idea was more than noticeable.

Lin smiled, "Go outside now, the girls are waiting for you."

"Only me? You're going out to play too, Miss Linda!"

And that's how my evening passed by, with this guy playing hide and seek in the house that will always be mine too, with the four girls I love with all my heart.


	9. Chapter 9

Another morning of another day waking in her completely white bedroom of her completely white house. The man who not-so-long ago had been her husband never really minded about it; of course at times he used to think their apartment could have a little bit of color, but never spoke it out loud. He was happy, anyway.

Yoko woke up with no one by her side, only a big puffy pillow where John's head used to rest. She made a collection of thoughts and memories to find out what had she done wrong; she literally gave him everything she had, and when he left he also took away a big part of her.

But she had to move on. She didn't have any children with John, so there wasn't anything attaching him to her. Why did she have to lose every single baby she got pregnant of with John? The drugs she consumed killed every baby she could have had before they even got the chance to get out of her belly.

But she did have a daughter after all, not with John, but with his partner at 1963, right when John had Julian and was married to Cynthia. Kyoko is the name of the pre-teen which Yoko lost custody of. She had stupidly lost her too. Maybe she could try to win the custody back, why not? She needed something to fight for, and that something wasn't going to be John. It couldn't be.

She got out of the Dakota building, just to take a walk to stretch her legs a bit. She wasn't expecting that journalist asking to interview her, although she had it coming since she divorced John and immediately the world found out.

She was angry and upset… definitely not a good combination.

_Q: Miss Yoko, would you mind sharing with us how did you and John divorced? What happened? You two seemed so in love and perfect for each other…_

_YOKO: What happened? Exactly the same thing that happened in his first marriage: cheating._

_Q: Cheating? Now that's a big deal. Is it a problem for you to share more details?_

_YOKO: Not at all, really. He cheated on me with the lad who used to be his songwriting partner: Paul McCartney. They have always had something going on, even before they were Beatles._

_Q: Are you stating John Lennon is… gay?_

_YOKO: That's what I said, yes._

_Q: That's shocking! So this thing between the two musicians isn't something new?_

_YOKO: No, not really. Remember Miss Powell? The woman which he only married because they didn't know contraceptives exit? He also cheated on her with the baby-faced lad. They have always had a sort of secret romance._

_Q: Secret romance, you say? So what happened when you came into the picture?_

_YOKO: John finally made a wise decision for once in his life and decided to end both of his failure "relationships" to be with me. Now he decided to end it, just like he ended that little band he used to lead._

_Q: Did Mr. Lennon cheated on you with another person other than Mr. McCartney while you were married?_

_YOKO: Not that I know. But of course, I can't trust that man. Cheating it's as natural as breathing for him. He's basically a whore._

_Q: Are you stating John will surely end his now openly homosexual relationship by cheating on the other former Beatle?_

_YOKO: I don't doubt it. _

_Q: Now, speaking about you… You must be devastated! Finding out your husband cheating is bad enough… but with another man?_

_YOKO: It's dreadful, indeed._

_Q: For closing the interview… Do you think this open relation between two of the former Beatles could be seen as a reunite of The Beatles?_

_YOKO: I don't know and I don't give a damn. Whatever he's planning it's not going to last long. Ready to join the __**Sgt John's broken relationships club band**__, Paul?_

_Q: That was the end! Thank you for sharing that information with us!_

* * *

After a great evening with Cynthia and Julian, John returned to his new house and found out Paul hadn't arrived yet.

Everything was turning out perfectly; he was going to see his son again hopefully tomorrow, and he said he had missed him. That meant he trusted his father for a second chance. Cyn had been so nice to him, and now with Paul by his side, what could possibly go wrong?

John's body was tired. Today had been a satisfactory day, but a long one too. He and Paul had woken up early to catch the private flag, and he went straight to Cyn's house about an hour after he got to know their home. Some stuff still needed to be unpacked, and he hadn't finished looking around the house to see what it looks like.

It was a pretty decorated house with some photo-frames all over it. He hadn't even gotten the time to look at them.

_My face has to be present in at least one of these._

The living room was full of photographs of Paul's daughters, all of them taken by Linda, he supposed.

The house wasn't big, but it had two floors. John had barely entered inside some doors. Now was the perfect time to do it. He knew Paul had to have a studio, or some room dedicated to music; which he found in the second floor (actually the second floor was the studio exclusively). It had a grand black piano, two organs, some guitars, amps, microphones, his beloved Hofner bass, even other instruments John didn't know how to play, like a violin and a cello. He also found a ukulele, and smiled sadly at the memory of his mother playing it for him. A harmonica was also part of Paul's instrument collection, which also reminded John of the early Beatle records, when he used to play the harmonica. _Funny, it looks just like the one I used for recording many songs… Shit, it's the same one! And is that the banjo I used to play when I was like sixteen? _Paul had saved many things from their past! The Dakota apartment in New York barely had any item of his past.

John also found two desks in which he supposed Paul would sit and work on his writings. They were full of papers, folders and little boxes. The myopic man eagerly but carefully opened the folders and the boxes, finding a whole lot of different memories. Paul had saved the little notebooks where they wrote the first Lennon-McCartney songs back when they were teenagers. He didn't even remember the rhythm of those! Some of John's teenage drawing and doodles were there also, even an old school report. Since how long had Paul stored all that stuff? Old birthday cards, funny little love notes, poems, the first scrabbles of most of The Beatles songs, plane and concert tickets, hotel cards, phone numbers… Tears were starting to flow down the corner of John's eyes.

Then, John's gaze directed to a wall of closets containing a whole lot of old stuff too. There was a cabinet with newspapers announcements: _"Beatles' single ´I want to hold your hand´ reaches #1" – "Don't miss The Beatles on The Ed Sullivan Show" – "Beatles bigger than Jesus?" – "´A Hard Day's Night' on theaters soon!" – "Brian Epstein, manager of the Beatles found dead" – "John Lennon and Yoko Ono spend their honeymoon in a bed-in for peace" – "'Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band' by The Beatles, first rock album that wins an Emmy award!" – "Paul McCartney confesses drug consume" – "Have the Beatles really broken up?" _

One of the closets was full of old clothes; Hamburg-era leather jackets, pants and cowboy boots, many suits, Sgt. Pepper's outfit, the costumes from that Shakespeare play thing they had to do… And photographs. Tons of black-and-white and colored pictures of all time, Beatle concert and movie posters, records… Shit, everything had a meaning to Paul, he was a sentimental keeper.

* * *

When Paul arrived home he sensed John was already there. Eager to tell him about Linda's plans of dinner tomorrow, he screamed to call his attention, "Joooohn! I'm heeeere!"

Still upstairs and admiring Paul's collection, John screamed back, "Comin'!"

He ran downstairs, and as soon as he saw Paul, without even saying a word, he pulled him into a tight embrace, resting his forehead in Paul's shoulder, grabbing his neck with one hand. "Thank you Macca. For everything. God, I love you so much…"

"I love you too, Johnny." Paul grabbed a lock of John's auburn hair and they shared a long, soft kiss.

"I was upstairs," John smiled sweetly.

"I noticed when I saw you running down the stairs, sweetie."

"Aw, you have never called me _sweetie _in your life!" John chuckled and smiled again. "It's perfect."

"What's perfect?"

"You," he kissed the tip of Paul's nose. "And also the floor upstairs…It's so…"

"Corny? Silly? Ridiculous?"

"No! It's so _you! _So adorable, special… I cried, y'know."

"No, I don't. I'm a silly keeper; I attach more than I should to everything."

"That's not silly, it's lovely. All those teenage memories… Hamburg… Our mop-top haircuts… Hell, you even got my harmonica! And all those papers, sheets, notes, drawings! There were things I even forgot I wrote! The costumes, the newspapers, the musical instruments… Just… Wow…"

"First it was going to occupy one room of the floor, then I realised I had so much stuff so I used it all…"

"You know what we should do? Go upstairs and work on a new Lennon-McCartney song!"

It was impossible not to notice how Paul was smiling with his eyes.

* * *

Paul had fallen asleep half an hour ago and was snoring lightly hugging a pillow. John was by his side, trying to write some poetry in a little notebook, often lifting his look to gaze at sleeping Macca.

_Macca is snoring, huh? I should record it and make him listen to it whenever he complains about me…_

Lennon was tired too, but he didn't want to sleep yet. His mind was full of ideas, and the sight of his lovely keeper sleeping by his side was inspirational enough to come up with something good.

_How he manages to smile while he's sleeping? It's so fucking cute!_

The phone rang late at night and John picked it up quickly not wanting to wake the sleeping beauty.

"_Hello?" _

"_John… It's me…" it was the voice of a female he knew well._

"_Yoko?"_

"_Yes. Sorry for calling at this hour, but I need to tell you something."_

"_What is it? And… wait, how did you know I was here?"_

"_You told me you were in London and I figured you were in Paul's house, so I just checked the agenda."_

"_Right! You've always been so clever."_

"_Anyway. I made a huge mistake. I'm so sorry."_

"_The divorce wasn't your fault, Yoko. It's just that…"  
_

"_I'm not talking about the divorce, John! Could you please listen?"_

"_What happened?"_

"_I said something to some journalist."_

"_What did you say?"_

"_I basically talked about our divorce and your relationship with Paul."_

"_I was planning on going public about it by admitting it myself, really. But now there's nothing I can do. It's not bad, though. What exactly did you say?"_

"_That's the problem…"_

"_What do you mean?"_

"_I'm sorry, John… I said some things I shouldn't… Basically the head-lines tomorrow are going to say you're a whore."_

"_What?"_

"_I'm sorry! I should have said it in a less resentful way…"_

_**A/N I hope you like this update, there's definitely going to be more. I'm open for ideas (:**_


	10. Chapter 10

_**A/N I decided to add some flashbacks of their old Beatle times. Thank you, TheScaryLittleGhostGirl.**_

* * *

_**1961**_

"_Macca! Guess who finally decided what to do with the money his lost auntie gave to him?" John proudly grinned at his younger friend._

"_You, I guess."_

"_Yes, me!" _

"_You're a lucky bastard, y'know. I've never seen a hundred quid in my life."_

"_Now you can see it!" he took out the envelope containing the money from his pocket. "Look!"_

"_What are you going to do with it? Buy a new guitar?"_

"_That was the first thing I thought, but that's not what I'm going to do with it."_

"_Then what are you going to do?" Paul curiously asked._

"_I'm taking a holiday!"_

"_Where?"_

"_To see Don Quixote!"_

"_Spain?"_

"_Yeah, but I'll make a stop at the city of love first."_

"_Rome?"_

"_Paris, you git."_

"_I suppose you're taking Cyn, then."_

"_Nope," he ruffled Paul's hair. "I'm taking __**you.**__"_

"_Me?"_

"_Didn't you hear well? Yes, Paul, I said __**you.**__"_

"_Why aren't you going to take Cyn?"_

"_She has finals at college, and if you don't want me to take you I'll take George."_

"_I didn't say that! Take me!"_

"_Oh, so you really want me to take you?"_

_Paul nodded._

"_I will __**take you**__ all the times you want when we arrive. I wouldn't take George; he doesn't have a cute little arse like you."_

"_Do you have to turn every conversation into sex?" Paul rolled his eyes._

"_I don't know, do I?" John laughed._

"_Bastard,"_

"_A bastard who's taking you __**to **__and __**in **__Spain. How does that sound?"_

"_Lovely." Paul finally smiled._

"_Aren't I the loveliest thingy?"_

"_Mmmm… I don't think so."_

"_Yeah, you're right. __**You **__are the loveliest thingy,"_

"_I am, yeah!"_

"_If you are the loveliest thingy on Earth, what am I?"_

"_The most important person in the life of the loveliest thingy on Earth," Paul kissed John's cheek._

* * *

"I'm a whore!" John screamed at the piece of paper he was holding in his hands.

"You're not, John." Paul took the newspaper out of his hands and threw it away.

"According to the newspaper you just threw out, I am."

"And since when does John Lennon give a damn about what a stupid paper says?"

"Since it says I'm a whore! It is attacking you! And also Cyn!"

"We were planning on telling the public about us anyway, John." Paul tried to calm him down.

"Yes, but not in _that _way! It's not the same going out in public saying _I'm in love with Paul and he feels fine, I'm so glad that he's my little boy… _than Yoko telling to a journalist that I'm a whore! And the _Sgt John's broken hearts club band _joke isn't even good!"

"We can explain the whole situation, John…"

"They won't hear! People from the press always hide the truth!"

"Maybe it's not that bad…"

"Not that bad?! The press hates me! I don't want anyone attempting to shoot me!"

"Shoot you? No one's going to shoot you, John. Calm down, love."

"I received letters from people wanting to kill me when the whole Jesus mess happened." John worriedly commented, remembering the 1966 polemic.

"You won't receive threatening letters, John. It's going to affect you only if you want it to do so."

"I won't cheat on you, you know that, right?" John lifted his gaze to look directly at Paul's eyes.

"I'm sure of it, John." Paul kissed his boyfriend's lips softly. "Please don't make this affect you. We'll clear everything up."

"Ok Macca…" he finally gave up and kissed Paul again. "I utterly love you."

"I love you too, John Winston,"

"You're my whole life, James Paul," John once and for all let out a slight giggle.

"And you're my universe, John Winston."

* * *

_Q: We're here with two people everyone has been longing to hear! John Lennon and Paul McCartney, former members of the best band that has ever played on Earth! Everyone knows what we really want to hear of them. So, the rumors of you two being lovers is really true?_

_JOHN: We're not lovers, we're an official couple, if that is enough to ask your question._

_Q: And is it also true that this romance started years ago?_

_JOHN: We've always had something going on, yes. But of course, we still had our girlfriends or wives, and I have a son, and now Paul has three beautiful girls. We couldn't have an openly gay relationship back when homosexuality wasn't even legal. We literally broke the law as many people did._

_PAUL: It was made legal in 1967, during the Sgt Pepper period, the same year Brian Epstein, who used to manage The Beatles, died._

_JOHN: We also couldn't role an open relationship just like that… It would have been bad for the reputation of the band._

_Q: So you never really loved your wives and girlfriends?_

_JOHN: Of course we did! Do you think I got married to Cynthia and Yoko because I was forced? Not at all, I __**wanted **__to get married, I loved them._

_PAUL: Back in the Beatle years, we didn't even think of ourselves as __**boyfriends, **__we just were inevitably very close to each other, acted lovingly and did illegal stuff._

_Q: You never thought about how it would hurt your female partners?_

_PAUL: Not really, because we never thought on leaving them._

_JOHN: It's difficult to understand, really._

_Q: I assume the other Beatles knew about it, right?_

_PAUL: They had to. They actually covered us lots of times._

_Q: Yoko Ono seemed very upset in her last interview where she talked about you two, and I must say she has the right to be. What do you think about it?_

_JOHN: Of course she has the right to be upset because I left her to be with Paul, but she also didn't have to be __**that **__rude._

_Q: Do you consider yourself a whore?_

_PAUL: Never again dare to ask him something like that again, am I clear?_

_Q: I don't know if I may ask this, but how did it all ended and re-started?_

_PAUL: We had problems with the band, which I don't want to talk much about… __**Apple Corps**__ turned out to be a disaster, our manager died, we stopped touring, we were all tired…_

_JOHN: We honestly needed a break and I fell in love with Yoko Ono and used it as an escape from all the pressure I had with the band. Then I felt really bad for the harm I caused not only to Paul, but to Cynthia, Julian, George and Ringo._

_PAUL: The Beatles' break-up was a depressing event for me, so I will move on to talk about how we re-started our relation. I was reading in the living room when John appeared in my house drunk…_

_JOHN: …And I ended up falling asleep with my head in his chest. That night we talked about the old times and decided we missed each other enough to start seeing us frequently again. _

_PAUL: We kept seeing each other… for romantic manners, until I forced him to choose between Yoko and me. I have had enough of hiding, pretending and lying._

_JOHN: Anyway, I think we already shared enough information. We actually said more than we should have, now if you please excuse us, we may go now. I hope you all can accept the fact that we are madly in love and we are ready to face the world no matter what the consequences are._

* * *

_**Paris, 1961**_

_It was a cold and dark, nearly 1:00am. The most potent light came from the beautiful shining moon of the Parisian sky. There wasn't the sight of any soul lying in the grass in front of the Montmartre Cathedral, other than two best mates admiring the beauty of the darkness._

"_I'm so glad we decided to stay here instead of going to Spain, this is so…" Paul whispered. _

"_Romantic?" John chuckled and gently grabbed the hand of the younger lad lying next to him._

"_That wasn't the specific word I was looking for, but yeah…"_

"_We're in the fuckin' city of love!"_

"_Thank you for taking me with you…"_

"_When we're famous, we'll discover the whole world together." He ran a hand through Paul's hair, inviting him to snuggle by his side._

"_I just hope we can really make it…"_

"_But of course! Have you forgotten where are we going?!"_

"_To the top?"_

"_And that is…"_

"_In the toppermost of the poppermost!"_

_The dark-haired boy rested his head in the chest of his auburn-haired friend, whispering clear enough for the other to hear, "I love you…"_

_John placed himself on top of Paul, and after covering his face with sloppy kisses, smiled and mumbled against Paul's lips, "Not as much as I love you."_

* * *

**_A/N Thank you for reading, remember I'm open for suggestions._**


End file.
